It’s not over yet!

It’s my mission to empower mid-life women just like you to be their biggest, boldest, bad-assed selves!
The way society dumps women over 40 on the scrap heap of life makes my blood boil.

We’re told that life is over, we’re basically “past our sell by date” and need to just quietly disappear into the background.
Hell no! It’s time to stand in our power and start to really live life on our OWN terms.

Who am I and why am I here talking to you about mid-life self-belief?

I’m Kate, and I’m right here with you in the trenches of “middle life”. (There is debate about the chronological ages this stage encompasses, so I’m going out on a limb and will say “40 and beyond”!)

I’m a white, cis-gendered queer woman. (Although I claim I “hate” putting myself or others in little boxes, it’s sometimes helpful, right?)

I live alone in a tiny but beautiful flat overlooking the sea. Living in Brighton is a joy, and I delight in all the culture on offer, as well as clearing my mind with brisk walks, taking in the spaciousness of the sea and sky.

I’m just starting to emerge out the other side of menopausal symptoms (I had no idea what peri-menopause even was, until after I went through it, and now realise that’s what all those strange things going on in my body were about!)

Coping with my Mum getting sick and then passing away at the end of 2019, followed by grieving and dealing with probate alone was tough, especially in the midst of the pandemic. (Even if, like me, you don’t have kids flying the nest, you are more than likely having to cope with caring for ageing parents at this stage of life, right? Kudos to humans doing BOTH).

I’ve been “tearing up the blueprint” since I quit trying to fit myself into a tiny corporate box and set up as self-employed when I moved to Brighton way back in 2003.

It takes guts to live on your own terms, and I’ve had moments when I SERIOUSLY doubted myself. Through learning how self-doubt works, I now understand it’s simply trying to protect us humans from perceived psychological risk. I just KNOW we can all move into a place of greater self-belief AND it’s probably a lifetime’s work!

Some fun facts:

My first girl-crush was at 15 (but the homophobic culture in my all girls school sent me straight into the closet and I didn’t come out until I was 20).

I swam a mile when I was 10 (I was always a marathon rather than a sprint kind of human).

I left home at 18 to live in a squat on one of the most notorious estates in South London. (I now own my own home and see no conflict with my earlier self).

I heard Angela Davis speak at UCSD when I was an exchange student in San Diego in 1986. (She was, and is, a brilliant human and inspiration for standing up for what’s right).

I “moonlighted” as a dancer in the Lusty Lady, a woman-run peep show in Seattle, while working my day job in Investor Relations at a bank opposite. (Both establishments have since closed).

I went to my first yoga class in London when I was 19, and felt I’d “come home” when I walked into the Buddhist Centre in Seattle in April 2001. I’ve been practising both ever since – completed my yoga teacher training in 2016 (for my own learning) and occasionally teach Buddhist meditation at Bodhisattva KMC in Brighton.

(I’ve always been a mass of contradictions, and firmly believe being a badass and renegade human can be the most fun when it comes from a place of genuine groundedness and self-acceptance!)

So, why Self Belief Coaching?

Rather than trying to push through self doubt or banishing your inner critic to achieve your dreams, self-belief coaching looks to understand and compassionately converse with the part of you that’s actually just trying to keep you safe.

In this way, you get to talk with your self doubt, disrupt its patterns and compassionately create new, much more supportive beliefs.

I Bloody Love Coaching

I’ve been coaching since 2004 after training with ICF accredited Coaching Development. I was hooked on day 1 of the first weekend module (yep back in the days when you could hug people on trainings, *sigh*).

In 2021 I completed my training with the Self-Belief Coaching Academy with Sas Petherick and it was life-changing and career-defining!

The methodologies I learnt are magic…

Think you have an “inner critic” that needs to be banished so you can achieve your dreams? Think again! Your self-doubt has been doing a great job of protecting you from psychological risk all these years, and you can develop a dialogue with this part of yourself to disrupt its patterns and compassionately create new, more helpful beliefs.

I’m convinced this is the missing link in what stops us humans from creating the lives we really want.